The lawyer's story

  • Created:
  • / Author: Aaron Lewis
 Recent discussion serious topic too much, seems to be a lawyer's life only rigorous not easy. Rarely have the evening of leisure, stories about lawyers.
    1, the court and the hospitalThe lawyer -- to a court clerk, see the beauty in "guide v." busy awfully, poked fun at the judge said that the court is another hospital: "guide v. table" is "the guidance Station", "file" window "is registered window", "legal fees" is "fee", "court" is "medical room", but not "the inpatient department". The judge then answer -- who said no "inpatient", short stay in "detention", "long stay in prison". I asked him, how about the death penalty? The judge said that it was "died". I said there are "unjust" is "medical accident" and "medical fault"? The judge nodded, so the leading two units are called "dean". I said the hospital basic is a doctor, the president of the court is not necessarily the judge? The judge replied, director of the hospital is not a doctor, the president of the court is not a judge, which is suitable for.
    2, the women's courtThe lawyer -- see beauty more and more court clerk, make fun of the judge said after the court will become the daughter of the country. The judge asked why, I said that on the one hand the clerk girls accounted for the majority, on the other hand, the clerk through the judicial examination pass rate of girls than boys, this does not mean that the judge will judge the world? The judge asked me, that through the judicial examination of the boys go? I said of course is to be a lawyer, after the law firm and the court is "equal".
    3, the "three hit" help lawyersGuangdong -- last year to implement the "three hit", the public security departments to work overtime. A judge to make fun of me, Party Secretary Wang Yang is a lawyer group, "three" is to help lawyers. I said "I wanna see", the judge said the "three hit" both are bad for the criminal suspect or the public security departments, but is good for lawyers, lawyers increases the amount of income from, I can not help but burst.
    4, the beauty of the judge flirtingA judge -- intermediate court made fun of me always on their court senior female judge "flirting", don't look at court seriously, in fact, a bad stomach water. I answered and said to him, big brother, we are also not ah, think that year Gaibangbangzhu Qiao Feng not flirting looked at the horse deputy leader 's wife Mrs Ma was torn, lose all standing and reputation, we do not judge flirting beauty, if that horse lady judge, not trouble? Besides, women need men admire them, everyone has the heart of beauty, can have the wrong?
    5, the divorce rateThe five or six year -- I divorce case, a judge will make fun of me often to destroy others family stability. I said, do you know which unit the highest divorce rate? He said he didn't know, I told him the highest divorce rate is in your court, especially economic tribunal. He said why ah? I said economic tribunal always dealing with exceedingly wealthy men, is not to say that Ma Lo would rather cry in the BMW car? I want to say, exceedingly wealthy men through the marriage judge whether bribery, bribery? The judge said, is this your Arabian Nights.
    6, always rationalLast year "three" -- the one making the dead pork cases, prosecutors accused dead pork twenty thousand jins, reason is that several defendants admit. I responded only subjective evidence (confession) no objective evidence cannot be convicted on the spot, without weighing cannot recognize twenty thousand pounds. Since the case of economic crime investigation department exists omissions hardly verdict, the judge was not happy to say, this is clearly dead pork, sold to a lawyer you eat? I replied, I certainly do not eat, the problem is the court not to lawyers "water" to the verdict, I to appeal a little hard, prosecutors will be on the handling a case police strict point, also can reduce a lot of miscarriages of justice. The judge said, your lawyer "always rational".
    7, the lawyer scourgeA judge -- chatting with fellow, he said the judge so busy are lawyers pests. I said it, he laughed at me you lawyers are "evil", hand does not stop to sue, on the other hand will hide evidence of your bad, this is not to judge the trouble? I said he is "to be entrusted loyalty affairs", "of course you should judge impartially processing", our position is not the same, but the judge's opinion is final opinion, of course, to be higher than the level of. The villagers said come on, actually have how many judges dare say more than the same period of high level of lawyers? I said, you are "official", we are "division", you represent the authority of the state, we represent the professional knowledge, you right back at you, all revolutionary work.
    8, from the clerk trainingA judge said -- you lawyers "sinister", and we always beauty clerk cotton. I said "do what"? The judge said, you always encourage beauty clerk to participate in judicial examination, and send the durian is sent to review data, this is not from the clerk stage began training with the judges of the feelings? I said no way, officialdom is also clerk from stage began to train officials, lawyers have to from the clerk or intern stage training judges, you think the lawyer easy ah? The judge said, Mingku ah, how not handsome lawyer culture I? I sigh pity ah, how no one is interested in the man?
    9, public security organs dinner-- a court the judge said, justice is the dinner, the police, prosecutors, judges rice cooking dinner. I say you judge how good, can wait for the prosecutor to dinner. The judge said, the police can cook eat, prosecutors end plate can be good to hide, leaving no nutrition give we judge, then unpalatable meal had to swallow. I sighed, today just know why the Public Security Bureau's Procuratorate corruption corruption than bad, than the court badly, originally is the dinner to blame.
    10, the law is-- a court judge said, not your lawyer. This is good, justice can be concluded, which have so many procedures. I teased, wrong, three lack what dishes? No lawyers to defend, your judgment not worse? The judge said, political and legal system, this is not your lawyer, trouble is you No. I said, big brother, you forgot your lawyer is court back please? Words that the Supreme People's court special court Jiang Qing, Lin Biao group, comrade Xiaoping makes instructions to make the trial stand the test of history, your president Jiang Hua thinks it will only put lawyers please come back, comrade Xiaoping "quasi sonata", we came back, to help you judge avoid "unjust"? The lawyer appears, correct your mistakes, your lawyer is the advisor, it is dark, not lawyers advice, you is the law!
    11, the lawyers sit up-- a group of hearing the case, more than a dozen lawyers do not put, the other only two prosecutors and judges, I make fun of say, lawyers can sit to the opposite (the man over there)? The lawyers have in juvenile court is form the round table. The judge is old acquaintance, responded by saying that we also have a vacancy, you lawyers sit up! Originally this case tension, moment ease many.
    12, the bed Ming Yueguang-- go near a county court judge, they were middle school teachers of Chinese origin. Do drink tea, the president heard that I have is a middle school teacher, so she asked me "bright moonlight in front of the bed" "bed" is what mean. Because it is under the watchful eyes of the people, I immediately alert, quickly contact history knowledge to answer -- the Tang and Song Dynasties, "bed" is a chair that today's stool, today's "bed" the ancients called "couch", the Moonlight before the bed poet sitting in the yard enjoying the moonlight on the bench. The president said, tried many friends, I have an expert, I immediately asked him by legal costs can reduce some?
   The story has a lot of "conflict" between lawyers and judges, no personal animosity between them, only the common will of the completed cases. The lawyer Yu judges should by legal lives together, so as to improve the rule of law, the protection of human rights in practice. No lawyer's participation, the judge can easily become "listen to only one side" and even the tyrant, the lawyer of the judge is the advisor.